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Joke of the Day

"It's too bad Batman's real name wasn't Bruce Bates, then Alfred would be saying Master Bates all the time."

"There is a special species of bird that is really good at holding stuff together... They're called velcrows."

"I hate it when I have lots of visitors but only enough chloroform for one and have to use it on myself."

"Who is the only person to get 15 Million dollars from a Nigerian prince? Hillary Clinton."

"What do you call Chinese jewelry? Bling blong"

"How does a tractor break up with its boyfriend? With a John Deere letter."

"I bet those 300 Greek soldiers would have stood a better chance if they thought to wear armor instead of going to war in capes & speedos."

"A Priest and a Rabbi Are walking down a street. They see a 13 yr old boy walking towards them The Priest says ""Let's take him down this alley and screw him"" The Rabbi says ""Out of what?"""

"Kanye West agreed to play Santa Claus under the condition that children had to ask him what he wanted for Christmas."

"I got my PHD in scatology today. Reading all of those YouTube comments was a pain though."