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Joke of the Day

"I bet those 300 Greek soldiers would have stood a better chance if they thought to wear armor instead of going to war in capes & speedos."

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"What do you say when a Polish magician performs a magic trick? Nailed it"
"Trump obviously has the support of the Freemasons He wants to build a wall, and do you know who gets paid to build walls? **MASONS!**"
"Where does a tugboat go when it feels sick? To the Dock"
"How many Frenchmen does it take to guard Paris? No one knows, it's never been done before"
"Boss: ""Thanks for making me my coffee. You know what'd go well with this?"" Me: ""The antidote?"" Boss: ""No, a nice..Wait, what?"" Me: ""Nothing"""
"If an elephant and a rhino have a baby, what do they make? Elephino! (Hell if I know)"
"Why does Snoop Dogg always carry an umbrella? Fo' drizzle."
"WIFE: What did you just do? CAT: *bolts for no apparent reason* ME: *bolts in the opposite direction in case she's after both of us*"
"How did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? By rearranging the furniture."