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Joke of the Day

"Therapist: We must remove our masks and express our true selves Yoga instructor: True Nutritionist: So wise Raccoon: This is bullshit, Alan"

"Why did Sally the Sloth sleep in all day? Because her crippling depression leaves her unable to function properly."

"A man walks into a bar and is immediately disqualified from the Limbo World Championships."

"What did the metaphysicist say when he came out of the bathroom? shit just got real!"

"Everyone in my family is quite wealthy and successful... ...but I hate following the crowd, so I decided to become a panhandler instead. I beg to differ."

"What does your s*** smell like? Freedom."

"What do you call a rabbit with a bent dick? Fucks funny"

"Why was Noah such a compelling character? He had a good ark."

"We have three types of friends in life: Friends for a reason, friends for a season, and friends for a lifetime."

"On its wedding night, why did the jungle cat have sex with the hotel receptionist? It was a fast cheetah"