131676
Joke of the Day
"What do Mexicans use to cut their pizza? Little Caesars. ...I'll see myself out."
Next Joke
"My friends usually get upset with how often I make jokes, but I need to stay strong. You see, seven days without puns makes one weak."
"There were ten zebras in the zoo. All but nine escaped. How many were left? Nine!"
"What do you call a helicopter mixed with a rhino?? Well hell-if-i-know!"
"A classic joke I heard from my friend about Hillary Clinton's emails [deleted]"
"ME: honey, just tap me on the arm tonight if you think I've gotten too drunk WIFE: I've been tapping your arm for the last 2 hours"
"A husband and a wife were having dinner... ... the wife dropped some tomato sauce on her top and said 'ugh, I look like a pig'. The husband responds 'AND you have tomato sauce on your top!'"
"""Hell, yes."" ...the devil answered the phone."
"Why isn't NSA mass surveillance a hot topic in the US elections? Because it's the only part of the govt that listens to the American people."
"What do you do if you lose all the information on your computer? Ask the NSA for a backup."