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Joke of the Day
"What is so good about dead baby jokes? They never get old"
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"A double entendre walks into a bar..."
"When there are no volunteers, they get appointed."
"I brought my Beats headphones to work, and instead of being left alone, I've had 7 rap battles and am in the finals against A$AP Carol."
"Sometimes I'll stop the treadmill at the gym and run in place. When people ask me what I'm doing, I'll say, ""Pretend stoplight."""
"july 4th is my favorite holiday bc i can practice my Friends theme claps every time a firework explodes without anyone noticing"
"How do the Muslims like their eggs cooked? Sunni side up. I know this is a Shiite joke."
"What's Borat's favorite neighborhood? Van Nuys"
"""911, what is your emergency?"" Yes I can't hear my television ""Sir, this is not an emer-"" Someone keeps screaming ""HELP ME!!"" next door"
"I'd like the chicken-fried steak, please."" Uh lemme get back to you *runs to kitchen* YO WE GOT ANY CHICKENS THAT KNOW HOW TO FRY A STEAK"