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Joke of the Day

"Balls... What do you call it when your balls are in the street? It's Cul de sac!"

"I spilled coffee all over my Macbook... ...now it won't go to sleep."

"Donald Trump should start preparing for next season of Dancing With The Stars."

"Why do technicolor pigs have great breath? Because the have a lot of pigments."

"Entered what I ate today into my new fitness app this morning... ...and it sent an ambulance to my house"

"Never trust an Adam... ...because they make up everything."

"My kids don't drive me to drink. Can't wait until they get their license and they can though."

"I'm running away to join the internet."

"Q: How many Pentagon procurement officers does it take to change a lightbulb ? A: Look for only $87 billion we can put up this chain of fluorescent satellites that will illuminate the whole planet."

"Why did Raggedy Ann get kicked out of the toy box She sat on Pinocchio's nose and said ""Lie to me bitch!"""