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Joke of the Day
"How do you tell the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer? The taste."
Next Joke
"Thinking about starting an independent pharmacy called ""Netflix and Pills"". Quality patient care with 24/7 Netflix while you wait. Thoughts?"
"Stop calling me a Karma Whore I'm a Karma Escort."
"At least cunts are useful you're not."
"I was going to write a gay joke.. ..butt fuck it."
"Death changes a man My entire life my father voted straight Republican, since his death he has been voting straight Democrat."
"BAD: When your date has been in the Men's Room for 45 mins. WORSE: When the 6 yo girl at the table next to you says ""he's not coming back"""
"If a white person eats a dessert and no one is around to Instagram it, did it even happen?"
"My Grandpa said, ""Your generation relies too much on technology!"" I replied, ""No, your generation relies too much on technology!"" Then I unplugged his life support"
"How bad is it, doc? ""Well, you'll never run again"" So basically the same"