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Joke of the Day

"X = Y The teacher asked the student, ""If x=y, what is x?"" The student answered, ""y?"" The teacher replied, ""why not?"""

"It looks like your face caught on fire and someone tried to put it out with a hammer."

"[if trump wins somehow] alien: ""i said take me to your leader"" me: ""dude i swear this is him"""

"I heard that John Cena had a failed porn career... Every time they tried to do the money shot nobody could see him coming."

"Why are protein shakes such loners? They're whey isolate."

"What is the poor part of Italy called? The spaghetto"

"Why is Tylenol white? Because it works"

"What is the climax to a telephone receptionist who is on cocaine ? A second line"

"The smarter the person, the less they tell you about it."

"I feel like a mentally disabled person with an Australian accent would be the most annoying thing ever."