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Joke of the Day

"Double negatives: A big No No"

"Doctor doctor I keep thinking I'm a bee Buzz off can't you see I'm busy?"

"My dad used to wash my mouth out with soap... But that was just to get rid of the DNA evidence."

"My therapist raped me. Who can I talk to about that?"

"Me: Help! i need my stomach pumped. 911 Operator: Did you ingest poison, ma'am? Me: No. Pizza."

"A recurring number walks into a bar'"

"Q: Why did Thoreau build a house? A: Because he wanted to be walled-in."

"How do we not know what women want yet? There are tons of conflicting lists all over the internet."

"LinkedIn would be richer than Facebook if they charged $200 to never get another email from LinkedIn."

"Anybody hear about those two car antennas that got married? Supposedly the wedding was alright but the reception was great ;)"