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Joke of the Day
"What's better than roses on your piano? Tulips on your organ ;)"
Next Joke
"What's the hardest part about cooking a vegetable? Fitting the wheelchair in the oven."
"See ya later, alligator. After a while, crocodile. Catch ya manana, little iguana."
"Christmas: One woman's lie about a one night stand that got completely out of hand."
"I went to the butchers and asked if he had a lambs head No he replied, it's just how I come my hair."
"Leather armor is best for sneaking Because it's literally made of hide."
"Mike's Hard Lemonade is basically Kool-Aid with a squirt of Purell in it."
"[Describing guy who just mugged me to sketch artist] ""He was literally kermit the frog"""
"It is a good thing butt cracks are vertical... If they were horizontal, we would hear clapping every time someone used the stairs."
"""UNLESS WE'RE OUT OF CHEESE THERE'S NO REASON TO SCREAM LIKE THAT!"" - me to my kid whenever he throws a tantrum"