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Joke of the Day

"24 men sucked off in Magaluf. 11 f*cked in Belo Horizonte."

"How do you spot a blind man at a nude beach? It's not hard."

"How many germans does it take to change a lightbulb? One."

"I try not to tweet about things I'm doing incase it gets taken out of context, but this cock is delicious!"

"Why couldn't the candle get any sleep? Because there's no rest for the wicked."

"The pen is mightier than the sword ...except in basically every real life battle scenario"

"What do you call a Russian with three testicles? Hudyanika Bolokov"

"What do you call a vampire who owns a restaurant? Count Spatula"

"Why can't you surf on microwaves? Because they're too small."

"I'd settle for separation of church and snakes."