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Joke of the Day

"I woke up because of birds chirping.nI wish I had wings too.nI would fly to each of these birds & choke them one by one. n6 am is too early."

"They're going to start playing porn at the fuel pumps.... This is so you can watch someone else being fucked at the same time as you."

"What do you say to piss off a british farmer? You're a peon."

"How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 13 million illegal aliens? Juan by Juan"

"Q: How does Stan Collymore change a lightbulb? A: He holds it in the air and the world revolves around him"

"Why do rednecks love Halloween? They get to pump-kin."

"I was drinking at the bar, so I took a bus home. That may not be a big deal to you, but I've never driven a bus before!"

"Which fly captured the ladybird? The dragon-fly."

"Is there an app that will make my iPhone go get my iPad which is way over there on the desk next to my iMac? iHopeso."