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Joke of the Day
"Donald Trump on Twitter: ""The Theater has always been a safe place"" Abraham Lincoln: ""Dude"""
Next Joke
"What's the difference between an Iraqi school and an Iraqi Army base? One poses a significant potential threat to ISIS and its continued existence. The other is an Iraqi Army base."
"I hired a pizza chef as my new golf coach. One way or another the dude is gonna fix my slice."
"I always disliked my hair but its growing on me."
"How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Don't be silly, feminists don't change anything."
"Hey what's something great from the 90s that they don't have anymore? The twin towers"
"Procrastination has taught me how to do 30 minutes of work in 8 hours and 8 hours of work in 30 minutes."
"What should you do if you're being attacked by a gang of clowns? Go for the juggler!"
"In Heaven, the angels asked God where he would spend his next vacation. Definitely not earth, God said. Last time I went there, I got a girl pregnant and they still haven't stopped taking about it."
"I just got a new job working for R.E.M. . . . I'm expecting a generous Michael Stipend."