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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between an Iraqi school and an Iraqi Army base? One poses a significant potential threat to ISIS and its continued existence. The other is an Iraqi Army base."

"[dont let him know you're a sponge] Waitress: *spills drink on table* GERONIMO *bellyflops on table* SPRAY SOME CLEANER I GOT THIS oh damn"

"""My desires are... unconventional."" ""Show me."" *opens door to a room full of memes*"

"What do you call a whirlpool in a church? Holy water!"

"A boy sat on a train chewing gum and staring vacantly into space when suddenly an old woman sitting opposite said 'It's no good you talking to me young man I'm stone deaf !'"

"if a blonde and a Asian girl would jump off a bridge who would land first? The Asian girl because the blonde would stop and ask for directions."

"I didn't see my face anywhere as a kid... ...then I realised it was right under my nose the whole time!"

"What do you call a fox that can't stop shaking? Michael"

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Cellar ! Cellar who ? Cellar. No I think she can be repaired !"

"Welcome to Starbucks how may I help you? ""Regular coffee with cream please"" That's $40, 5ml of unicorn tears, and 10 dragon scales. ""TEN?"""