129952

Joke of the Day

"Why have sumo wrestlers began shaving their legs? They were getting tired of being mistaken for feminists"

"What's fatter than your mom? Your mom after her next meal."

"""Let's get this show on the road."" ~ Guy who invented parades"

"Calm down penguins. You're just a flashy suit and a few body parts away from being a platypus."

"Porn gives unrealistic expectations. The plumber took his usual 60 per hour, even though I sucked his cock."

"How do Freudians describe the human mind? As a huge ENEMA, I mean huge enigma....."

"Mom used to say the only accessory a fashionable girl needs is a virtuous reputation. But it's bracelets."

"[in bed] ""No, I'm serious Amy. If this were a buddy cop movie would you try to avenge my murder even after the Chief took your gun & badge?"""

"What is Samsung CEO's favorite movie Total recall"

"I've got ten texts msgs today asking me for sex tonight. I wouldn't have minded, but I've borrowed my girlfriend's cell phone for the day."