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Joke of the Day

"Mom used to say the only accessory a fashionable girl needs is a virtuous reputation. But it's bracelets."

"What's the difference between a deaf person and an Italian? One talks with their hands and makes goofy noises at random volumes, and the other can't hear."

"What does a clock do when it's hungry? It goes back 4 seconds."

"First off I want to commend you for taking part in credit counselling. Now, under assets you wrote ""like an onion"". Can you clarify?"

"What's the best thing about fucking a transvestite? Reaching around the front and thinking, just for a second, that's it's gone all the way through"

"I tried to explain what integers are It was pointless"

"Why did the ghost cross the road? To come back from the other side."

"Where do sick boats go? The dock!"

"Bernie Sanders to ban Oral sex if he becomes president.... ""It's the only way I can get reddit to stop sucking my dick"" - he said."

"Why aren't there many jokes about the Jim Jones massacre? There would have been, but the punch line was too long..."