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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear that H.P. Lovecraft wrote a cookbook? It's called the Necronomnomnomicon."

"I hate when people try to start conversations while waiting for a urinal Why don't people mind their P's and Q"

"I bet Pope Benedict will appear on Celebrity Rehab this season."

"In honor of easter, here's a joke my French teacher put on the board last week. Easter is a bonne idee."

"I wish that Game of Thrones was on Twitter So George RR had to limit it to less than 140 characters."

"I washed my antibiotic pills down with a probiotic shake and now I'm back to square one."

"Banker: You're sure you want a reverse mortgage & get how it works? Me(imagines bank making huge unaffordable payments to me for years): Yes"

"What did the cave woman use as a dildo? A fucking rock"

"I was watching some strange porn the other night... ...it had a fat naked guy perched on the end of his bed, crying while he masterbated. Then I realised I hadn't turned the tv on."

"There's an app for everything today except premature ejaculation but I hear that it's coming soon"