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Joke of the Day

"Banker: You're sure you want a reverse mortgage & get how it works? Me(imagines bank making huge unaffordable payments to me for years): Yes"

Next Joke
 
"[At the stress test, staring at a treadmill] Dr.: Just run at a speed where you can still talk normally. *sits down on a chair* Me: Okay."
"What do you call a dog that is a magician? A Labara Cadabarador"
"Why did a physician go to prison? His medical license was doctored."
"After telling joke that made me seem gay to my friend... I started laughing and said, ""Sorry, I'm not thinking straight."" Badam tsss"
"Hey girl, can I have a pizza? Pizza that ass."
"Why are there no Jews on Jupiter? Because it's a gas planet"
"What does Gollum think about Gandalf's smoking addiction? Stupid, filthy habitses!"
"Whats the difference... Between a hormone and and enzyme? You cant hear an enzyme."
"I saw many places when I fought in WWII.. But I did Nazi Germany."