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Joke of the Day

"What did Michael Jackson ask his father's mother when she slipped and fell to the ground? Granny are you okay,I said granny are you okay,are you okay granny?!"

"What sound does a gay magician make when it disappears? Poof"

"Shot through the heart and you're to blame, you give body armour manufacturers a bad name."

"How can you tell you are dealing with an extroverted engineer? He's staring at somebody else's shoes."

"When you talk to ghosts, they always tell the truth. When you speak with them, they're really transparent."

"Why did the black man cross the road? Better question is what the FUCK is he doing outside of the cotton field!?"

"Fact: Bernie Sanders won't release his birth certificate because it proves that when he was born he was already a 74-year-old man"

"I've had 6 cups of coffee and am about to shave my pet cactus"

"What refreshing beverage will no red-blooded American male ever drink again ? ... wait for it ... an ice-cold Bruceski"

"Yay! The healthcare reform bill passed! Waitress, a round of celebratory abortions for all my friends!"