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Joke of the Day

"""Beer: Helping White Guys Dance Since 1842"" Posters Helping White Guys Seem Funny Since 1998"

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"Velcro. It's a rip off."
"I always wanted to be just like Flo Rida. That's why I changed my name to ""New Ham Sure"""
"Why did the dictator's plane crash? It was stallin'"
"Do you want to get dinner sometime? Sorry, I said that wrong. Do you want to get me dinner sometime? Like deliver food to me and then leave?"
"My dad asked me if I wanted to join an acapella group in college I told him I was straight."
"[sees cute girl at the bar] ok it's go time [makes accidental eye contact with her while pumping myself up with some lunges] dammit. abort"
"Torque is like drugs It makes everything spin around."
"Me and My wife wrote the best articles on how to create a successful marriage I would have published it but she took half of it in the divorce settlement."
"I've got a good joke for you guys... But you've probably all Reddit before."