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Joke of the Day

"I'm not afraid of spiders. I'm afraid of people who are afraid of spiders. Please stop screaming and put down the hammer."

"What do young ghosts write their homework in? Exorcise books."

"I was out shopping today; guess who asked about you?! Nobody."

"I'm trying to find a job cleaning mirrors It's something I could really see myself doing"

"A SO with an STD is like Play-Dough, They're fun to play with, not to eat."

"If you weigh a whale at a whale weigh station, where do you weigh a pie? Somewhere over the rainbow, weigh a pie."

"They offered me money to promote a product in my Twitter account, but my dignity is strong, as Axion ""The true grease stain remover"""

"If you really think about it, Jewish people are actually pretty solid nah just kidding, they're all gas"

"Thank you. I am completely satisfied by your explanation and have no further questions. - No child ever."

"Reasons to date me: 1) 2) 3) please?"