129592

Joke of the Day

"A tree silently weeping as firemen steal its cat. Again!"

"Picking up a Sea World Protestor Should we go back to my place, free willy and see how long Tilikum? Guaranteed Soak-Zone."

"Whenever a long lost friend calls me, I get suspicious & wonder if he's calling me to sell Amway products.."

"I wish women would put the toilet seat back up after they're done using it."

"Why wouldn't the frog lend his hammer to the mushroom? Because it's a toad's tool."

"If WWII had happened in 2015, and Hitler hadn't killed himself: Interviewer: So, Mr. Hitler, what were your reasons for having killed 12 million people? Hitler: It's just a prank, bro!"

"Apparently the owners of Aldi and Lidl were really brothers. Presumably Aldi was the alder one and Lidl the Lidl one."

"I like my women like I like my coffee ground up and easily dissolved."

"What do you call a group of twelve, angry, well-endowed men? A hung jury."

"I don't drink water, unless it's been through a brewery first."