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Joke of the Day

"Apparently the owners of Aldi and Lidl were really brothers. Presumably Aldi was the alder one and Lidl the Lidl one."

"According to my roommate's diary, I have boundary issues."

"What do you call an origional joke on r/jokes Mine"

"""Son, I found a condom in your room"" ""Gee, thanks, Grandpa!"" ""Why are you calling me Grandpa?"" ""Because I couldn't find it yesterday."""

"How do you make holy water? Fill a pot with water and boil the hell out of it."

"Why do computer scientists get Halloween and Christmas confused? Because Oct 31 = Dec 25"

"Please stop telling me how you wish you had my curly hair. You don't know the struggle of waking up looking like Mufasa."

"""I see your bet and raise you all my hair since 6th grade. Oh and this pen."" ""Sir that's not- ""You got a problem with pens?"""

"I like vegans! I meant vagina's!"

"You know what's nuts? My balls!"