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Joke of the Day
"The ugly barnacle. Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end."
Next Joke
"How many seconds are there in a year? Twelve"
"There's plenty of jobs in the porn industry when you have a dick like mine. Camera man, light and sound technician."
"People who say they'll be late for their own funeral* *trust me. you'll make it."
"""john could tell that emily was getting tired of him narrating their date"""
"I just found out a distant relative of mine has eaten three people. It's a lot to digest..."
"Why does Mexico never do well in the Olympics? Anyone who can run, jump or swim is already over the border"
"Why is Christopher Walken so tired? Because at night, he's always sleepwalken"
"To convince my boss that I'm keeping busy, I periodically yell ""YOU THINK THIS IS A GAME?"" into my phone, then slam down the receiver."
"Q: How many Pisceans does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None: only the inner light matters."