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Joke of the Day

"If cupcakes could talk, boy, there sure would be a lot of screaming in my house."

"What's hairy and has five fingers? A thalidomide's armpit"

"A duck wearing a shoe walks into a bar The bartender says ""Hey Duck, I think you lost a shoe"" says the duck: ""No, I found one"""

"I went to a gay bar. As I sat down to order a drink, I went to a gay bar. As I sat down to order a drink, a kind gentleman approached and offered to push my stool in."

"The way to a man's heart is thru his stomach. At least that's what the crazy woman with the butcher knife kept saying at the murder scene."

"I was wondering... since there are great white sharks, how come there aren't any great black sharks? Then i realized even if there were, they probably couldn't swim..."

"Between Trump and Clinton, who is more likely to start a nuclear war if elected president? America, with the missiles aimed at ourselves."

"what did the old man say before he kicked the bucket? old man ""how far do you think i can kick this bucket""."

"One Girl, Two Cups would be a terrible name for a bra shop."

"Kwanzaa and Festivus were both made up in 1966. One is a joke holiday that no one should take seriously. The other was featured on Seinfeld. hat tip to u/AudibleNod"