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Joke of the Day
"Pick up artists and garbage men should switch names."
Next Joke
"Putting my Christmas decorations on the house across the street so I can, you know, see them."
"I got my hair cut this morning and my wife still hasn't said a thing about it. omg, I'm so mad right now I can barely breathe."
"What did the alien say to the gas pump ? Don't you know its rude to stick your finger in your ear when I'm talking to you !"
"The only thing that bakes at room temperature. Stoners."
"if carrots could get you drunk.... rabbits would be fucked up."
"I shoveled half my driveway yesterday but my wife's still not happy because it just so happens to be the top half the sun melted."
"You know how asparagus makes your pee smell? Well, I just heard from my father for the first time in 14 years."
"Britain is like a man on a toilet... It just wanted to get rid of that shit and leave."
"I thought you were Russian... ...but it turns out you were just Stalin and Putin me off."