128805
Joke of the Day
"What did one Melon say to the other after it was asked marry it? We Can't Alope"
Next Joke
"oh so you rich guys throw the water out after you boil hotdogs. too good for hotdog soup. too good to dab the soup on your wrists like colog"
"What's Michelle Obama's favorite vegetable? Barackoli."
"What's the most Jewish instrument? The Sachs"
"If you want to keep a secret from me, write it and send it to me as a Facebook event invitation."
"My work out class has a cancellation policy of $15 if you cancel too late. Which means I just spent $15 NOT to work out. I am my own hero."
"Friends and family sometimes said I was a kid stuck in a man's body. The police say I'm a man caught in a kids body."
"A serial killer leaves his mark on his victims by cutting off their left hand and right leg. Authorities say something sinister is afoot."
"I spilled spot remover on my dog... ... He's gone now (credit to Steven Wright)"
"Just heard someone screaming outside and my instinct was to turn up the TV. Whatever the opposite of a superhero is, I'm that."