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Joke of the Day
"Someone told me that I looked familiar. So I asked them if they watched porn."
Next Joke
"boss: I've been reviewing the security footage from last night and... me: OH SHIT! boss: OH SHIT IS RIGHT! YOUR DANCE MOVES ARE ON POINT!"
"I spend like $600 every month on free trials for stuff I forgot to cancel."
"I walked a girl down into the dark woods. She said it's very scary. I said how do you think i feel i have to walk back alone.."
"When do men insist that women are illogical? When a woman doesn't agree with them."
"[1st date] You're gonna love this place *pushes you out the passenger side door and drives away"
"Does it take more than one Mexican to screw in a light bulb? No, Juan knows"
"piss me off and I'll put you on my kid's school fundraiser mailing lists"
"What was Michael Jackson's favourite musical key? A Minor"
"What kind of bears don't have teeth? Gummi bears. ;)"