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Joke of the Day

"I came home to a trail of bread leading to the bedroom & of course I followed, only to find my husband in bed with 10 ducks. I'm heartbroken"

"Your mother is so fat... ...even whilst fucking her it feels like a long-distance relationship."

"I like my puns like I like my sausages... the wurst ones are the best."

"Bob Ross went to hell... ...to beat the devil out of it ;) P.S. Just finished watching some episodes. I miss him so much ;( Paint in peace my friend...and God bless ;)"

"Juror:We find the defendant- *pizza guy bursts in* ""Ive got 2 pizzas for Not Guilty"" Defendant: Im Not Guilty Judge:NOT GUILTY *bangs gavel*"

"i just sighed so hard that i blew out a candle that was 2 feet away from me. tragic."

"so a cheetah and a lion decide to have a race The cheetah wins and the lion says ""you're a Cheetah"" the Cheetah says 'nah you're Lion'"

"16 sodium atoms walk into a bar... Followed by Batman."

"Cop cars aren't very intimidating. Add a crazy plow covered in blood, an anarchy symbol and spinning saw blades and I'll stop in a heartbeat"

"knock knock who's it? omelet. omelet who? am late, open the door."