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Joke of the Day

"Bob Ross went to hell... ...to beat the devil out of it ;) P.S. Just finished watching some episodes. I miss him so much ;( Paint in peace my friend...and God bless ;)"

"Sometimes I spice up my love life by getting my girlfriend to wear a long black nightgown with buttons on it. Makes her look just like a remote control."

"Did you hear that the Post Office had to recall its series of stamps depicting famous lawyers? People were confused about which side to spit on."

"What is a spectre's favorite theme park attraction? The Roller Ghoster"

"My daughter has gotten to the age where she asks me embarrassing questions about sex Just this morning she asked me ""Is that the best you can do?"""

"How does an eyelash, so soft and fine, turn into a cheese-grater when it gets under your eyelid?"

"Woman across from me will NOT shut up about her where she works. Ugh, I hate job interviews."

"A simple ""Fuck you"" can save hours of conversation."

"How can you tell a sumo wrestler from a feminist? A sumo wrestler shaves his legs."

"[solicitor reading my will] ""He [takes off glasses & pinches bridge of nose], He wants to donate his arm to the drummer from Def Leppard""."