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Joke of the Day

"Why did the computer split up with the programming language. Because 1 or more arguments were invalid!"

"Due to a mix up my cat ended up in a beauty contest and not at the vet. To my surprise she apparently won some gimmick trophy for fluffiest butt. It was a real *catastrophe.*"

"What did the caught fish say to the fisherman in the net? Well man it's been reel."

"At a wedding where the minister told everyone to stand next to the person who makes life worth living. The bartender was almost trampled."

"I couldn't decide how to propose to the love of my life So I decided to ask her husband for advice."

"What do you call a cow masturbating? Beef stroganoff!"

"Did you hear what happened when Oedipus got flu? He became one sick mother fucker."

"Kate Upton as the spokesperson for Game of War"

"I got gas for $1.08 today... ...too bad it was from Taco Bell."

"Lotta single women are getting a ""What's up?"" text right now."