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Joke of the Day

"My minivan is always rocking, but it's usually because I'm trying to smack one of the kids in the backseat while I drive."

"Lost My Job I've been sacked from my job as a roller coaster ride operator. I'm suing them for funfair dismissal."

"Apparently, walking up behind a girl in the produce isle with celery in my hand and saying ""I'm stalking you"" was much funnier in my head."

"So I'm here at the wailing wall, like a moron, with my harpoon."

"I think it has become obvious that medicine companies have no idea what fruit tastes like."

"My girlfriend left me for a hindu guy. Anyway, he'll treat her better - they worship cows."

"What's hairy dangerous and only surfs the Net when there's a full moon? The www.erewolf."

"What do you call the student with the best overall average in a graduating class at an all girl's school? vulvavictorian"

"For me, the hardest part of the driving test was escaping before the car filled with ocean water."

"My boss wanted revenge. Boss wanted revenge on me for sleeping with his wife. So he stole my phone to get my girlfriend's mobile number. Poor bastard's been sending dick pics to his daughter all day."