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Joke of the Day

"We can't deny our basic human instincts, like automatically thinking we kind of already know how to play the harmonica whenever we hold one."

Next Joke
 
"What did one passive aggressive republican say to the passive aggressive democrat? I don't know, let me go check my Facebook feed."
"Tomb Raider gave me carpal tunnel syndrome. ...and that was just the box art."
"Had to have ""the sex talk"" with my daughter, she was a little overwhelmed so I left out the part about golden showers & donkey punches"
"There is a fine line between ""important to me"" and ""dead to me."" Don't walk it."
"I like my women just like Apple... Manafactured in China."
"I'm so sick and tired of my friends who can't handle their alcohol. The other night they dropped me three time while carrying me to the car."
"Idea: Breathalyzer tests at the airport, to make sure you're drunk enough"
"A Sober Irishman... ."
"How many racists does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Racists dont like to be enlightened."