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Joke of the Day

"What do you say to a guy with kidney stones? Urine trouble."

"I met an award winning farmer yesterday He was out standing in his field."

"What's the difference... What's the difference between Pussy and Cunt? Pussy is warm, furry and wonderful ! Cunt is, unfortunately, in charge of pussy..."

"My new record in a 100 m sprint Is 52 meters."

"When I was a child, my dad tried to force-feed me. After a while, my mum said, ""Just use a fcuking spoon, Mike. You're not a Jedi."""

"In my office, I tried pushing the envelope... But it's still stationery."

"What can walk over the water, but can travel under the water without getting wet? Jesus in a submarine."

"If you eat too many salted pretzels on Halloween, what happens the next day? November thirst."

"The less you love a woman, the faster your hand gets tired."

"I hear that in Star Wars VIII they're going to introduce Han's perpetually depressed younger brother. His name is Y Solo."