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Joke of the Day

"In my office, I tried pushing the envelope... But it's still stationery."

"What's the best thing about being born on 9/11/99? You had the two biggest candles on your second birthday."

"If an angel statue is removed from a fountain... ...would that make it a sans seraph font?"

"A study have shown that there are actually twice as many boobs than women."

"Fred: Betty has lovely long red hair all down her back. Harry: Pity it's not on her head!"

"You know what they say about non sequiturs... I LOVE pineapple upside down cake! (I just made this up today, and I'm so proud. I told my coworkers, but they told me to stop doing drugs.)"

"Man, I hated Alex Haley, the author of Roots... He always had his niggers in a *twist*."

"My friend had to go to the doctor, because all he could see were dicks. Turns out he was cock-eyed."

"If your status update contains the words, ""I know 99% of you won't repost this,"" there is a 99% chance you're an idiot."

"If you ever meet a girl named stone... Don't take her for granite"