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Joke of the Day

"What can walk over the water, but can travel under the water without getting wet? Jesus in a submarine."

"How many out of date redditers does it take to change a light bulb? OVER 9000"

"How do you clean a condom? Turn it inside-out and shake the fuck out of it."

"What made the world stop being Blue? The new softcap limits"

"Adele is an amazing singer. The problem is, when one of her songs comes on, everyone else thinks they are, too"

"First cannibal: Am I late for dinner? Second cannibal: Yes. Everyone's eaten."

"What do you get when you mix chocolate milk and cocaine? Ovalsheen. Credit goes to my cousin on this one."

"Life is like a box of chocolates... It's expensive, you don't like half of it, and sometimes you can give the whole thing to a woman and she still wont have sex with you."

"My uncle went to Ireland on holidays but didn't have time to go to Clare. He really wanted to see Moher"

"So reddit announced today transparency is important to them. Unless its about Ellen Pao. the end."