126314

Joke of the Day

"If I ever get a dog, I'll name her Robbery When I get to store, I'll tell ""Get down, Robbery"". Dog lies and the whole store too."

"What the the planet Jupiter say to Neptune? I can see Uranus from here."

"Why did the snail draw an ""S"" on the side of his car? So that when he drove by people could say, ""Look at that escargot!"""

"So pokemon go is now just as popular as tinder. Both are apps where you swipe to find monsters in your area."

"Fine, you drive. I won't tell you how. I'll just yell WE'RE GONNA DIE WE'RE GONNA DIE! I'M GONNA THROW UP AND WE'RE GONNA DIE til we arrive."

"If you are dating a girl that doesn't like Star Wars... You are looking for love in Alderaan places."

"that kid at the public pool who kept screaming at his mom to watch him jump in grew up to be a blogger"

"What does a pizza delivery boy and a gynecologist have in common? they can smell it, but they can't eat it."

"How do rainbows laugh? Hue hue hue"

"Tell me again how I unloaded the dishwasher too loudly when you were watching golf. Detectives will want to know exactly how this went down."