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Joke of the Day

"What idiot called them swordfish instead of... oh, no, wait, actually that's pretty good."

"What do you call an angry wind? A cross breeze."

"Watching The Bible. Didn't realize everyone spoke w/ a British accent back then. Neat."

"Why are Japanese people all skinny? Because of their national diet."

"CASHIER: ""Did you find everything you were looking for?"" ME: ""Oh, yes..."" [places ""How To Murder A Cashier"" book on counter]"

"What do you call five tomatoes? A tom-a-FOOT! In Europe, they call it a tom-a-METER."

"I've got a good knock-knock joke, but you have to start"

"I witnessed a kidnapping on the bus today... But don't worry, he woke up before his stop."

"What did the pedophiliac rabbi say to the young boy? Hey there little boy, you wanna BUY some candy?"

"Why does everyone have to point out they adopted their dog? Are they worried that we are suspicious because it doesn't look like them?"