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Joke of the Day

"I have an unemployed wife and two kids. I am definetly not DINK. I am SITH. Single Income THree dependents."

"BAD: When your date has been in the Men's Room for 45 mins. WORSE: When the 6 yo girl at the table next to you says ""he's not coming back"""

"I bought some shoes from a drug dealer recently. I don't know what he laced them with, but I'm still tripping."

"Why do LEGO men hate going to hospital...? Because plastic surgery costs a fortune!"

"Listening to dubstep. Wait nope just my cat tumbling in the dryer."

"Just made a playlist for hiking. It has music from Peanuts, The Cranberries, and Eminem. I call it my trail mix."

"Google changed to Alphabet Mostly alpha, not making it to bet-"

"Crime really does happen at Pokestops! I met up with my dealer at one last night."

"What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer? A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again"

"Doctor said getting some natural light would help with my depression. Now I'm depressed *and* hung over."