125724

Joke of the Day

"When I get home to find my wife naked in the tub, seductively asking me to ""warm her up"", I dont waste a second.. to throw in a hairdryer"

"My friend asked me if I wanted to watch Dr. Strange. I declined because I have Stranger Things to watch."

"I took 8 courses of spanish... ...but then they cancelled Dora the Explorer"

"What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter it's not gonna come anyway"

"What do you do if your girlfriend starts smoking? Slow down and use Lubricant."

"Knock! Knock....."

"Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over? Me: Do you know why I stopped? *silence* *a saxophone wails in the distance*"

"The 1st cup was used in 1874, the 1st helmet was used in 1974. It only took 100 years to learn our brain is also important."

"Panic rooms are a great way to protect yourself during home invasions or like if you forget your wife's birthday."

"What's the difference between a picture of Jesus and Jesus? You only need one nail for the picture."