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Joke of the Day

"I was at an ATM and this old lady asked me... ...to help check her balance, so I pushed her over."

"Can officially confirm that the way to a man's heart these days is not through beauty, food, sex, or alluringness of character, but merely the ability to seem not very interested in him."

"No I don't think you're stupid, I just think you have real bad luck when it comes to thinking"

"What is the only law that Hillary obeys? The law of gravity"

"I'm starting a new movement that encourages people to take things one step at a time Unfortunately, it's taking a long time to catch on."

"My grandma married 2 men named Grover. I think she just had a thing for the name Grover, because she also married 2 women named Grover"

"Yo' Mama Jokes Battle! I'll start! Yo' Mama is so skanky, her dildo came with jumper cables."

"Why was the wall in a store? Because it's wal-mart."

"When I was a kid I was afraid of the dentist... Probable because he was a pedophile. Which begs the question of, how many fillings did he give me?"

"Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull."