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Joke of the Day

"Don't flatter yourself, any type of milkshake brings me to the yard."

"Q: How was the pig defeated in court? A: Oinkontroverible evidence against it and oinkonsistencies in the defense."

"What do you call a German guy wearing basketball shoes? Herr Jordan"

"The orphan sat there, apparently. Get it? A-parently."

"Going to How to Train Your Dragon tomorrow... Or marriage guidance counselling as the wife calls it."

"Just watched the documentary FOOD, INC. And I'm absolutely disgusted. From now on, I'm only having sex with organic chickens."

"When I lose a follower, I like to pretend they were Taken, then I go to Europe and shoot absolutely everyone."

"What do Jedi use to view PDF files? Adobe-Wan Kenobi"

"I bet black unicorns have the biggest horns."

"Whenever anyone mentions something about a vicious cycle, I imagine an evil bike that can't stop killing."