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Joke of the Day
"What do you call the second-most hated politician in America? Madam President."
Next Joke
"Office morale has increased noticeably since we put a tarp over Dave's body"
"What is the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair"
"""Dude."" ""Dude."" ""Dude."" ""Dude."" ""Dude."" ""Dude."" ""Dude."" ""Dude."" ""Dude."" ""Dude."" ""Dude."" ""Dude."" - crickets (translated)"
"Wonder why my son doesn't want me to walk him to the bus stop? Maybe I'd better unhook one of the straps on my overalls like the cool kids."
"What has two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a cat"
"With only one plug in this hospital room it's not looking good for Nana's respirator if my phone battery dies and I have a good tweet."
"It's good to know how to jerk off sometimes... It comes in handy."
"Have you heard about the billboard company who only did JPEG files? I heard they got a lot of stretch marks."
"Yo mama so lazy she's got a remote control just to operate her remote!"