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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a dog that harasses kids? A pit bully!"

"Real friends don't get offended when you insult them. They smile and call you something even more offensive."

"I said I wouldn't go drinking in public again, but here I am waiting for my kids to get out of school."

"I like how Band-Aids come in 2 varieties: Stays on For a Second Before Falling Off or Needs WD-40 For Removal From Skin."

"I can't wait until the 50th Anniversary Special... I'm very interested in who JFK will regenerate as."

"Why is it so hard to break up with a Japanese girl? You have to drop the bomb twice."

"Sex is like a snowstorm... Sex is like a snowstorm: It's advertised a beautiful, in reality gets messy very quickly, and if you take 10"" overnight you are *not* moving the next day."

"Butt sex is a lot like spinach If you're forced to have it as a child, you probably won't like it as an adult."

"What's easier to pick up the heavier it gets? A woman EDIT: Grammar"

"I'd never compare people I don't like to Hitler, but the people who make the little ""x"" button impossible to find on pop-up ads are Hitler."