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Joke of the Day

"Whenever I read the phrase ""We've changed our privacy policy,"" I just shrug and assume they already have pictures of me on the toilet."

"The 9-year-old in me thinks life is all about fun. But then I think, how long is it gonna take to digest this kid? I'm a huge python, btw."

"What does a dishonest frog say? FIBBET"

"So Knock Knock Knock Knock Whos There Me Me Who Miguel ps: my name is Miguel"

"Do we even know if ducks can fart? We should put a guy on that."

"Take time to relax especially when you don't have time for it."

"How to rap like Pit Bull: Spanish Spanish Spanish Mr Worldwide DALE!!"

"Why was Ohm the Empire's best scout? He discovered the resistance"

"Sometimes I say big words, even when i don't know what they mean They make me sound photosynthesis."

"I pan fried chicken tonight. On another completely unrelated note: the firemen in my town are gorgeoussssss."