122353

Joke of the Day

"Best if said out loud... So a mango's (man goes) in a bar... What the hell is a mango doing in a bar? But chessy but gets a good giggle :D"

Next Joke
 
"Why does a blonde wear green lipstick? Because red means Stop."
"Why does Hillary Clinton have two Ls in her first name? 1 for 2008, 1 for 2016"
"Why did the sperm cross the road? Actually, I should probably stop masturbating at this point."
"If you like someone, pretend they're a charger and you're an iPhone on 1%. Run to them. Grab them. Plug them in. Wait, I lost the metaphor."
"Why did the Siamese Twins travel to England? So the other one could drive"
"What do a sprinkler and an unemployment line have in common? Spic-spic-spic-CHINK-nigga-nigga-nigga-spic-spic-spic-CHINK-nigga-nigga-nigga (say out loud at your own risk)"
"[being chased round my house by a murderer] ME: PLEASE STOP THIS IS SENSELESS MURDERER: What? ME: [puts Fitbit on] Ok carry on"
"Parents tell you their baby's weight because they have no other information. They can't say ""Meet Jim, a free spirit who's into yodeling."""
"Paris is suing Fox News for repeatedly insulting it. Also suing them for the same reason: your intelligence."