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Joke of the Day

"Cowboy:"" Give me three packs of condoms, please."" Cashier:"" Do you need a paper bag with that, sir?"" Cowboy: ""Nah...She's purty good lookin'...."""

"Helen Keller What was Helen Keller's favorite color? Corduroy."

"When I was a kid, I was told ""If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all."" For the first seven years of my life everyone thought I was a deaf-mute."

"Why did the Dad divorce his wife after she named their son? She named him Oedipus."

"Don't date men who will hold open a door for you. Date men who will punch a squirrel in the face for chittering it's teeth at you."

"What's a Polygon? A dead parrot."

"My favorite exercise is a mix between a lunge and a crunch It's called lunch"

"Why was Hitler late to his meeting? He couldn't HEIL a cab."

"I don't know what my wife is most upset about today. The fact that she caught me having sex with her mother this morning or the fact that her mother died during her sleep last night."

"What type of car would Jesus drive? A Chrysler"