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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a robbery in China ? A Chinese take away !"

"What did the doctor tell a welder when the welder asked if his girlfriend(a pilot) using alternative lube was giving him erectile dysfunction? Jet fuel can't melt steel beams"

"An Irishman, a homosexual, and a Jew are sitting at a bar What a fine example of an integrated community."

"God *twisting an owl*: I can't get this damn jar open."

"Why couldn't the effective vitamin supplement achieve true happiness? He was too super fish oil."

"What do a gynecologist and pizza delivery man have in common? They both can smell it, just can't eat it."

"I like my women like I like my antiques. . . Oriental and fragile."

"Just been to my first Muslim birthday party. The musical chairs was a bit slow, but fuck me the pass the parcel was quick!"

"I swear to god I'm not harassing you, I'm really out of shape that's just my labored breathing"

"Me: oil change plz Toyota: it'll be $39 Me: cool heres my $2 off coupon 4 hrs later T: ur steering wheel fell off total is $2900 sign here"