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Joke of the Day

"ITS A BOY"" I shouted ""A BOY, I DON'T BELIEVE IT, ITS A BOY"". And with tears streaming down my face I swore I'd never visit another Thai Brothel!"

"Why was the leper hockey game canceled? There was a face-off in the corner."

"The animals that like to be pet are the ones that feel the best to touch how dope is that"

"What do you call Washington State after a long rain storm? Washed a Ton State. I woke up with that joke in my head this morning. My brain is weird. Had to share it with someone."

"Customer: Why doesn't your menu list prices? Waiter: We didn't want to make you sick before the food does."

"I'm all wet! ""Give it to me!"" she yelled, ""I'm so fucking wet, give it to me now!"" She could scream all she wanted, I was keeping the umbrella."

"When I jerk off I'm not a fancy restaurant about it, I'm more like McDonalds Fast, easy, and you don't have to get out of the car"

"Star Wars should cast an Indian actor to play Mace Hindu."

"So the other day this guy almost died because of [removed]"

"A guy says to a girl ""hey, can I smell your feet?"" She says ""NO!!"" ""Oh, it must be your pussy then."""