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Joke of the Day

"What did one penis say to the other penis? I just want to belong"

"Now that Scalia, the bullfrog of SCOTUS, has passed away... Can we say he finally croaked?"

"When I die I'd like to be cremated I think I've urned it."

"The biggest profit I made from going to was college was Selling my t9 calculator"

"Can February march? No, but April may."

"What did one gay sperm say to another gay sperm? How do we find an egg in all this shit? Credit to my friend telling me"

"""If I write something completely creepy under a girl's Facebook photo, maybe it WON'T be creepy if I end it with 'lol.'"" -guy logic"

"The Jolly Green Giant is into bondage. I guess you could call him a collared green."

"phones are so much more than just phones nowadays, like they can also be napkins, or paper towels, or tiny depression machines, or napkins"

"What did the apple say to the pear? [Man, go] away!"